War Ends, Life Begins
by LiL LoNeLY iSa
Summary: Relena wishes to step down from her position as VFM. Will the people let her? And if she goes, will she go alone? Heero/Relena


**Please Read** =)  
AUTHOR'S NOTE 7/26/02:   
I wrote this story quite over a year ago under a different pen-name, but never submitted it to FF.net. Being the first fanfic I'd ever written, I didnt really know what to do with it. I submitted it to a few sites, and was able to get some nice reviews; subsequently, I wrote a prequel to this at the request of some people. Unfortunately it didnt do so well. That kinda made me stop writing, with a grand total of two fics. lol. Well, lately I've been getting back into the fanfic groove, not necessarily in Gundam Wing, per se, but in other categories as well. So, after nearly 2 years of inactivity, I've decided to give it another shot. But first, I'd like to get some feedback so I can have a better idea of where to go with my writing. That's why I've decided to put this particular fic back out there, and see what happens.   
  
It would really mean a lot if you could review. Constructive critisism is entirely welcome, but please, no flames. I'm very aware of the diversity within the GW fandom, and I'm also aware of the intense separation between groups. If this story isn't what you like, then just stop reading. It's as simple as that. Also, keep in mind that I was only 14 when I wrote this! Thanks, everyone.   
**END NOTE**  
  
  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own them! Really. I'm just letting the characters out to play. They're bored and so am I. ~_~  
(More notes at the bottom)  
  
War Ends, Life Begins  
________________________  
  
October 4, AC 198  
Earth  
Howard Auditorium   
8:27 P.M.  
  
  
  
This was it. This would be how it all ended. 'Or, rather,' she thought, 'how everything will begin.' The blond Vice Foreign Minister took a deep breath, gathering her courage, as she paced back and forth behind thick, blue curtains.   
  
  
Clack, clack, clack...the sound of her high-heeled shoes against the hardwood floor shattered the prevailing quiet. Light rustling noises told of millions of imagined wrinkles in her clothing, being smoothed over, again and again. In between bouts of keeping the extremely disobedient attire contained, her dainty hands would come up to her hair, which was behaving in quite the same manner. Breathful after breathful of air was taken in and out, in and out, but she didn't seem to be getting as much oxygen as she needed.   
  
  
Sweaty palms clutched a stack of note cards. Words, scrawled between the lines; words that she knew, knew by heart, practiced again and again in front of a mirror. But this time, she wouldn't see her reflection as she recited these pondered-over words. She would see the people. The honest, expecting people that she worked so hard to keep safe; worked for, and loved. These were people she knew, people she could relate to, people who she could see a bit of herself in. Maybe this would be more like practicing in front of a mirror than she thought.  
  
  
"....thank you....touching indeed....lucky..."   
  
  
Relena began to review her speech aloud as she paced, walking faster and talking louder as the butterflies in her stomach began fluttering their wings faster. Breaking off, she gave a sigh. "Keep calm, Relena," she admonished herself, and stopped her movement altogether. Closing her eyes, she thought, 'That's right, wind down, keep calm......calm,' she punctuated this with a deep breath. '...calm,' and another... '...peaceful,' and another... '...tranquil,' another......  
  
  
"SCREW IT!!!!" her yell resonated in the empty room behind the drapes. Blinking her eyes open abruptly, she resumed her previous frantic movements. One step, clack, another step, clack, breathe, smooth blazer, rustle, smooth skirt, rustle, fix hair, breathe, another step, clack, step again, clack, clutch notecards, breathe, turn, repeat. At the same time, her thoughts were running 100 miles a minute. 'The lights are too bright - what if I forget my speech? - what if I drop my notes? - what if they don't agree? - what if this isn't the right thing? - what if I lose my voice? - I wonder if I look alright - Am I coming down with a fever? - I have a meeting at 2 - any minute now - any minute now....aaahhhhhh!!!!!'   
  
  
Relena had attended many public gatherings, but from her actions, no one would be able to tell. In actuality, 'many' was a gigantic understatement. In addition to this fact, she had been at the center of most of such meetings. Pressure was a thing she could handle; stress was something that she never really noticed anymore, since there was no point in time when there wasn't any. Stomping her heel on the floor to let her energy out, Relena approached the curtains and peeked through, staring at the activity on the stage in front of her. Dozens of people bustled about, setting up the auditorium for their speaker.   
  
  
"Vice Foreign Minister!" a stage hand called, as he strode toward her, clipboard in hand. The shout jarred her out of her thoughts, making her drop the note cards and send them flying.  
  
  
Pushing all her worries aside, and promptly forgetting about her scattered speech, Relena quickly schooled her face into a calm, demure mien. "Yes?"  
  
  
"I apologize for the delay, but we're gonna have to push your public address back about half an hour. Preventers are still getting clearance for the television and radio stations. We'll have to wait awhile before we can start. Good news is, you have an extra half hour to relax!" the chipper man finished off with a smile, and Relena felt sick at the thought of being alone with her incoherent thought streams any longer.  
  
  
"Oh, it's perfectly fine," she replied, without a trace of her inner emotion, "As long as everything's OK"  
  
  
"That's great, Miss Darlian. We'll cue you 5 minutes till you're on, alright?"  
  
  
"Half an hour?" she asked the man.  
  
  
"Yep, half an hour Vice Foreign Minister," giving a nod of confirmation, and making a check on his clipboard, the man gave one last smile to the blue-eyed girl before setting off to other various tasks.  
  
  
Relena brushed some hair out of her eyes that had escaped from its French twist, and let out a whoosh of air. Noticing the jumble of cards that was her recitation, she swatted at the fabric of the curtain in annoyance before bending down to pick up the mess. 'Half an hour,' her mind mocked her. 'Oh goody,'  
  
  
From his position in the rafters, Heero Yuy pushed dark brown hair from his eyes and watched as she scrambled to put her cards in order before proceeding to pace. And worry. And fidget. "Have courage, Relena," he whispered. "You're much stronger than this. But maybe I should be telling you this in person. What makes this speech different from the other 100 you've made?" Shaking his head at himself, Heero watched as the blonde girl sank into a chair, her efforts finally tiring her.  
  
  
Relena held face in her hands as her guard continued his vigil. 'OK,' she thought, 'so, it doesn't end yet.'  
  
  
* * * * * * * * * *  
  
  
  
Earth  
Howard Auditorium  
9:03 P.M   
  
  
  
"Hi, this is Grace Sate reporting live from Howard Auditorium. We're 5 minutes away from hearing Vice Foreign Minister Relena Darlian speak. This is, of course, an important meeting; it was called by the Foreign Minister herself. As to what the topic of discussion will be tonight, no one knows for sure, but there are speculations.   
  
  
"As you can see here, the seats are absolutely packed with people, and many more are still coming in. In this reporter's opinion, this will indeed be a night to remember. We'll keep you updated with live coverage when the meeting starts. This is Grace Sate, it's 9:03, and we'll see you after this commercial break," the dark-haired reporter gave a smile, then lowered her microphone before turning to the camera crew. "Cut it. That was good. Now, let's see if we can get a word from Miss Darlian." She and the cameramen proceeded backstage. Apparently, every other station was thinking the exact same thing.  
  
  
The noise backstage was deafening. Reporters and crew members, as well as newspaper journalists, were jostling past each other, trying to get a comment.  
  
  
"Where's the Vice Foreign Minister?!?"  
  
  
"Can we get a statement?!!?"  
  
  
"We're the best paper in the country!!"  
  
  
"One quick comment!!!'  
  
  
"A few questions for Miss Darlian!!"  
  
  
"Could we have a couple minutes??!"  
  
  
Papers were flying, cameras were recording, pens were scribbling, feet were shuffling, and an exasperated Lucrezia Noin stood in the middle of all the chaos.  
  
  
"Excuse me, ladies and gentlemen," she began, but was unheard in the commotion.  
  
  
"A word with the Minister!!!"  
  
  
"One minute will be fine!!"  
  
  
"Excuse me," she tried again.  
  
  
"Keep the cameras rolling!!!"  
  
  
"When does the meeting begin???"  
  
  
"If you could all just quiet down..." again her attempt was unsuccessful. "LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, WITH ALL DUE RESPECT - SHUT UP!!!"   
  
  
The room became totally silent. Not one shuffling paper, or noisy camera, scratching pen, or stomping foot.  
  
  
"Ahem," Noin began, "thank you. Now, to answer your questions and comments: Miss Relena is where she should be. No, no statements or comments can be taken at this time, due to the fact that you are all making me quite mad. I don't care who the best paper in the country is. You can have as much time to ask questions after the Foreign Minister is finished. I would like all cameras to be turned off backstage and kept off until the meeting starts. And to the last question: Now."  
  
  
For a moment, silence reined once more. The media persons looked at each other in confusion before realization dawned....  
  
  
"Out of my way!"  
  
  
"Channel 55 is gonna have the first live coverage!"  
  
  
"Not if we get there first!"  
  
  
"This is Grace Sate backstage...."  
  
  
"Let's get out there!"  
  
  
"Move!!!"  
  
  
The crowd of people herded themselves away from the back area to find a space in the audience to report from, and in a flurry of notepads, pens, cameras, and limbs, the backstage was empty, save one person.  
  
  
"Amazing what type of information you can procure if you would just listen," she said wryly, running a hand through her dark hair and striding out of the room and onto the stage.  
  
  
- - - - - - - - - - -   
  
  
"Five minutes, Miss Darlian,"   
  
  
The voice once again surprised her, but this time Relena kept a firm hold on her speech. "It's time?" she asked, ignoring the nervousness creeping into her mind. She stood, almost a little too quickly.  
  
  
"Almost," the man smiled his chipper smile and went to check the microphones.  
  
  
Relena brushed honey-colored strands from her forehead and took her place directly behind the curtain. She stood there, this time too anxious to pace. She was a living statue for 5 minutes. Five minutes that took an eternity to go by.  
  
  
- - - - - - - - - - -  
  
  
Noin made her way across the floor and stood in front of the podium. The murmurs in the audience slowly halted, and the purple-eyed woman leaned in closer to the microphones. "Ladies and gentleman, I'm glad you could all make it here this evening. I don't wish to take up your time, when I know that it isn't me you came here to see tonight." she smiled, "and so, without further ado, here is your Vice Foreign Minister, Relena Darlian."   
  
Lucrezia walked off the stage, but not without scanning the crowd first. The journalists and reporters were hurrying to take their places. She smiled a little half smile, then looked towards the front of the congregation and spotted something that brought a full grin to her face. 'Boy, will Relena be happy..."  
  
  
- - - - - - - - - - -   
  
  
"...Relena Darlian..."  
  
  
The young woman knew her cue when she heard it. Stepping through the drapery, Relena was greeted with thunderous cheering and applause. She smiled and nodded to the crowd before moving to the lectern. In the one step it took to take her closer to the platform, all her anxiety and worry faded away. It was she and the attendance. This was right. She blinked and squinted her eyes through the bright lights, stared at the note cards, then turned them facedown on the stand. She didn't need them. She already had the words. Taking a long breath of air, she looked at her audience and began.  
  
  
"First of all, I would like to thank you all for attending this voluntary conference. Your wish to hear what I must say is touching indeed. And to everyone at home, my thanks as well. I am glad that I will be able to share this with you; I am also thankful that I have been lucky enough to have a chance to do so with all my previous addresses." she looked into the cameras as she paused, like she did at all the other conferences, giving equal time to each station. With a serious look on her face, she continued, this time making eye contact with members of the audience. It gave her more courage when she saw the people looking back at her.   
  
  
"Secondly, I wish to express this: We are fortunate people who, along with the whole world, have been given a hope, chance, a miracle. We have, in short, been granted life. Our children are free to live their lives without the fear, the turmoil, the devastation we have endured. They need not experience the life we ourselves have just escaped, and we have done so, yet not without repercussions. Although some people have not seen the battlefield, nor the inside of a prison camp, we are all joined in this: we have been prisoners. Prisoners of war, of hate, of one another. Yet we have reached our goal, and the goal was peace.   
  
  
"The world has given the children a great gift: their childhood. As one who has experienced the pain of this blessing's loss, I urge you: Never let them take it for granted. I know that many of you have gone through the same thing. I am thankful that I have had such incredible friends and advisors to help me in my position. Surely, I cannot have accomplished as much as I have, if not for the aid of these people. Know that I am eternally in your debt. Although I wish that I could find some way to recompense you all, I hope you know that I have carried on in my work for you. Realize that I, in my own way, am giving you back as much as I can, and am hoping it could be enough. As for the reward of the people, I offer this to you - peace. Take it and cherish it, but caution yourselves that peace will last only as long as the people wish it to. Have rest in the knowledge that your universe is in good hands, the hands of people who care." She looked up in the balcony seating and saw her brother, Noin, Lady Une, and Sally. She smiled at them, and they nodded in acknowledgement.   
  
  
"Aware of this, I beseech you to take heed. We have paid a great price to come to where we are today. Many have paid with their lives. Although I wish to console you with the thoughts of the end of suffering, I must sadly admit that there can be no such promise. This peace cannot bring back our lost loved ones; I regret that nothing can. What I do not regret, nor shall I ever, is that these soldiers had the courage to die for what they believed. I say this for all the lost, everywhere. I hold no bias against those who gave their lives from the opposing lines. I have great respect and admiration for all who believed with passion, with fervor, with all honesty. These are the amazing people who we must model our lives after. Although humans will never all share common ideals, the zeal that these people held in their hearts, souls, and minds will reflect, in essence, that enigmatic, awesome truth that all people strive for."   
  
  
In the audience, three girls sat proudly regarding their friend. They had all come a long way since the war had started, and they knew how important this was. Relena's words were ringing true to everyone in the auditorium. The Vice Foreign Minister stood with her regal air and her honest and determined countenance, and every single person watching could not help but admire her.  
  
  
"You go, girl," Hilde whispered, with tears of pride welling up in her eyes.  
  
  
Catherine nodded in understanding, as Dorothy bowed her head, 'No matter what happens, to these people, she will always be their leader.' They all continued watching as the figure on the stage continued.   
  
  
"To the families and friends of those who have departed from us; have courage. Be comforted in the fact that their pain is over. They have moved on to a better place. For those of us left behind, we must work to ensure that the world lives up to what these men and women gave their lives for. So far, I am proud to say that we are doing quite a good job." Here Relena paused, and swallowed back the lump in her throat. She stayed quiet for a couple of moments, and seemed to hesitate before proceeding with confidence.   
  
  
"In saying this, I rue the fact that I must move to the main point of my oration. I believe that what I have chosen to do is the best for all people, as well as what is best for me. It would come as a shock to no one to hear that I have seen and been through much. Compared to what others have come out of, I cannot say that I have suffered any more than a single person standing here tonight. Compared to some, much less. I am sorry to say that I may not ever understand how such a person might feel, but I imagine that these are very strong people indeed. I can never know what is in your mind, in your heart, but only what I myself have experienced. I do not claim to know your heart, but I can confidently say that in my own time, I have come to understand myself extremely well; I have found myself to be quite a different person than what I thought.   
  
  
"All I have learned, all that anyone has helped me to discover, I hold in my heart and know in my soul. In spite of this, I feel that I haven't learned enough. I, although I have come to love my position and my people dearly, was placed in this job, unready. Many people forget, as sometimes I myself do, that I am only a teen. I do not claim that I am unqualified, nor do I claim that I am now some sort of prodigy. All I must say is this: I wish to have a chance at a new life in this peace, as I know so many others do." Relena looked to the front of the audience. She saw, in the reserved seats, the gundam pilots. Every single one of the five. Duo, grinning widely at her and giving her a thumbs-up; Quatre, eyes sparkling, and smiling his gentle smile; Trowa, whose eyes told her that she was supported all the way; Wufei, with a look of reluctant approbation on his face; and last of all, Heero. She focused on him as she spoke.   
  
"For a long time, I have had a weight on my shoulders that can finally be lifted. Although the war is over, we are still fighting. This, I am tired of. People have credited me with great achievements, but it is truly the people who have chosen their own path."  
  
  
'What are you doing, Relena?' Heero asked her with his eyes.   
  
  
'You'll see,' she returned in her mind as she kept talking, "People mourn the loss of their leaders; this, I say, do not do. Instead, mourn these losses as those of your brothers and sisters in the human race, for there were no human leaders in this battle. We have all served as best we could to our principles and beliefs. The leaders of men were followers of their heart, and so, in order to be the leader you deserve, I must follow mine. I would like a chance to be among you, my people, really and truly. I see that you are tired, some of you carry sad hearts. I would like to heal myself with you. Quoting words not mine, but from long, long ago, "...from where the sun now stands, I wish to fight no more, forever."  
  
  
Prussian blue eyes widened as Heero understood what she was about to do. And as he realized what he himself must do in turn.   
  
  
"In saying, I would like to resign from my position as Vice Foreign Minister of the people and pass my status into the capable hands of those on my council." Gasps of astonishment were heard throughout the crowd, "I do believe that this is the best for all, but unless I have approval from you, I will continue serving to my ideals within the confines of my position." she paused, eyeing the audience, "Is this right thing? Do you approve?"  
  
  
The room was silent for a split second, as all of the words hung in the air and everyone in the room held their breath. Time slowed down, and Relena could hear her heart beating. Slow and steady. Her eyes roamed the room as she took in the thousands of people gathered together. For a moment, there was uncertainty, and then she knew that everything was right. The sound of the first person clapping reached her ears, and she turned her head to see Heero Yuy on his feet, clapping. The rest of the audience followed in suit, and the auditorium was filled with loud, energetic sounds of approval. In the space of 2 seconds, Relena's life was decided, and as Heero led the crowd in a standing ovation, Relena gave a genuine grin and let out her breath. Laughing lightly, she spoke once more.   
  
  
"Thank you...be assured that this will not mean that I will stop caring for the people. I will continue to work to make all our lives better. I keep all my promises. For my last words to you as your Vice Foreign Minister, I again quote, and hope you will take to heart, '...although I cannot come to each of you here in this room, I would be much obliged if you approached me, to take me by the hand.'  
  
  
"We have come along way; let us keep progressing forward. Thank you." Taking one last look at the still-roaring crowd, Relena exited the stage with tears running freely down her face.  
  
  
Below, Duo turned to speak with his friend, who was at the moment nowhere to be found.  
  
  
* * * * * * * * * *  
  
  
Relena walked down the long hallway to face the press. 'I'll have to do it sooner or later, I suppose,' she thought, as she wiped her face on the sleeve of her jacket. The steady clack of her shoes echoing off down the hallway was joined by the running thump of boots.   
  
  
"So glad you dressed up for the occasion," she greeted him without turning around.  
  
  
Her pursuer stopped, looked down at his boots, blue jeans, and black leather jacket, and looked back up. He wasn't ready for that one. "Relena..."   
  
  
"I'm finally free, Heero. Even greater, so are you. Enjoy your peace, Heero Yuy, you've well deserved it." she swiveled around and her light blue eyes settled on his. 'I'm ready to let you go,' she thought, 'so you will be totally free. So you can be happy.' she turned back around and began walking, "I have the media to meet,"  
  
  
"What will you do?" Heero's low, firm voice inquired. The question stopped her, and she paused a moment.  
  
  
"I don't know," she answered slowly, "Of course, nothing can go back the way it was...I'm not sure I want it to. I guess I'll do something I haven't been able to do in a long time: I'll take it one day at a time," she cocked her head slightly to the side, "In any case, you don't need to be listening to me. You have better things to do, and I'm sure you would love to get to them. I'll let you go now."  
  
  
"If you're just telling yourself that to avoid the truth, then this is one time that you're wrong," he replied, approaching her slowly.  
  
  
"And what exactly would that be?"  
  
  
"The truth is, that what you just said is wrong." His matter-of-fact reply was accompanied by a small smile.  
  
  
"Not only does that answer nothing, but it has me confused," she said, but with a smile of her own. "Are you saying that you'll stay with me?"  
  
  
"As long as I can." his eyes held hers, and she saw something more in his words.  
  
  
"And if that's for life?"  
  
  
"Not my loss."   
  
  
Relena laughed as she walked even closer to him. "Very fitting, Heero. This is as close as we're gonna get to fervent love declarations, isn't it?"  
  
  
"For now," he answered.  
  
  
"With all we've been through, I wouldn't have it any other way," she reached up to embrace him, and grinned as he looked down at her.  
  
  
"Me either," he replied, before leaning down for a kiss.  
  
  
Moments later, Relena looked down the end of the hallway, where loud noise and commotion could be heard. "Come with me?" she asked, gesturing in the direction of the sounds. Heero nodded, and they resumed walking, hand in hand.  
  
  
- - - - - - - - - - -  
  
  
".....and so, war ends and new life begins. What will happen in days to come? No one knows, but we'll all get through it together. This is Grace Sate signing off."  
  
  
  
  
The End  
  
  
Notes:  
  
- the whole speech was inspired by the speech that Chief Joseph of the Nez Perce Native Americans gave to his people, advising them to surrender to the explorers/settlers. The quote "...from where the sun now stands, I will fight no more forever..." is taken from this speech.  
  
- the auditorium was named after General Howard, who was the General that Chief Joseph was surrendering to  
  
- Relena's second quote was from George Washington's final oration to his men, as leader of the Continental Army. His request that everyone should "take him by the hand" was responded to by every single official that he addressed.  
  
- the last scene, in the hallway, was inspired by my favorite scene in the X-Files movie (the scene where Mulder and Scully almost kiss. Man, I wish the movie scene would've ended that way) (BTW, I don't own that, either, please, don't sue!)  
  
- DISCLAIMER: Just in case the other one wasn't clear, I own nothing. Not at all. The pen and paper I used to write the rough copy was borrowed from my sister. I OWN NOTHING!!!! (aawww...that's kinda depressing)  
  
Thanks for reading! 


End file.
